Crab apples.

I think they are anyway. Outside my window, on a tree.

If they really are crab apples, then that makes it a crab apple tree. The point is that they are falling off the branches every three minutes or so. They are falling onto an expensive car.

One of these days, one will fall off that isn't a crab apple after all, but a lead weight. It may even cause damage to the expensive car.

It won't have my fingerprints on it though.

No
Sirree
Bob.

Not good ole Montmarceys' fingerprints.