I've been asked to Jam.

For the first time in a long time, some mates have asked me to come and play guitar with them. Hopefully we'll manage to get pissed while we do it. Hopefully we'll have a good Jam.

How to have a good Jam.

Get drunk, then pretend that you are amazing at your chosen instrument. If it doesn't sound good, lament the fact that you don't have a drummer. If you have a drummer, lament the fact that you don't have a good drummer. If you have a good drummer, lament the fact that you don't have a good drummer.

Never play stuff that anybody else knows. It's boring and someone will be able to play it better than you.

Take any substances that are offered to you. If you take enough substances, you will channel the spirits of dead mucicians. Don't tell anyone this is happening, they are thinking the same thing, only different musicians, and they're glad they're dead.

Bring your own amplifier, it may be worse than theirs, but the volume is yours and yours only to control.

If all else fails, G=get drunk.