Monday, August 21, 2006

The 'I've done a poo and you're gonna find it.' look.

When I was a wee snipe we had a dog that used to go to the toilet in the house. Wasn't really his fault, we'd go out and leave him in there with nobody to open the door for him. His response on our return was always tragic. He would greet us at the door with a cursory wag of the tail, to show that he appreciated our return, and then look into each one of our eyes individually.

Now, dogs are very responsive to facial expressions, but humans often find it difficult to gauge what a dog is trying to say. It's a common misconception that the littlest hobo was showing concern when leading passers-by so some poor dimwit stuck down a mineshaft. If you read his body language, often what he is actually sayins is 'Ohmygod! You've gotta see what this fuckwits done! I ask you, and you lot have opposable thumbs.' So our confusion was understandable.

Often we would end up on a wild goose chase around the tin mines dotted around the local area. Meanwhile the dog would be getting more and more nervous, waiting for us to give up, go home and find the poo in the bathroom.

In light of this, and with the gift of hindsight, I wander what would happen if, say, a Mr Reid were to come back to Downing Street after a pleasent meal in Weatherspoons just up the road, and find a certain Mr Prescott waiting for him with that look upon his face?


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